Have You Ever Experienced Workplace Bullying?
Workplace bullying may be on the rise and how you set yourself up to tackle it is vitally important. In fact you may prevent it without even saying a word. How you deal with it when it does strike requires some careful preparation.
I should know I have experienced some pretty rough workplace bullying myself and it can take many forms. From overt to clandestine and even hard to detect when done through a 3rd party this can make it even harder to prove. However, once you get used to standing up for yourself it becomes hard to stop and the energy, just the energy you learn to put out is enough to stop bullies from operating around you.
One such situation that I found myself in was after leaving the Army, sure I'd experienced bullying in the military but it was an environment that I knew how to operate in. The outside world was another story.The manager that I was working with at the time started excluding me from meetings and getting a little bit nasty especially when I'd ask what transpired in the meeting that I was excluded from.
So we had it out, and she mentioned that she didn't think I was up to standard and started using terms that I hadn't heard before like strange names for power point presentations and that sort of thing. Once she realised that I was going to take this lying down she started to backtrack a little. So I finished by saying, as it was the end of the day, that the next morning I would come back to work and tell her what I needed from her, in order for us to be able to work together.
The next day I came back and said that I wanted 3 things, one of which was the opportunity to call it out if we didn't understand each other. This was a veiled way of saying that I wasn't going to be spoken down to anymore. Anyway, the next day she quit, she came in before I started and claimed family issues.
This should come as no surprise, although it surprised me at the time. The reason for this is that bullies hate to be exposed they are cowards and can't survive in the light of day.When confronting bullies be clear about the bullying and concise and as firm as you can be.
Don't be dissuaded from your mission, and remember bullying is subjective so they can't tell you you're wrong, try as some of them might.
One of the things that helps more than anything is to accept yourself unconditionally that way you come to the interaction from a neutral space which will make you more grounded. Give it a go.